It is such a relief not to have to worry about losing my job because of possible threats of harassment for voicing my concerns. My reason for writing “No Alibi” was to make sure that if any Larry, Mo or Curly took a shot at me it would be perfectly clear what their motive is.
The first recording of a conversation I had with Colonel Mustard (Mr. Army Jacket) was on 10/19/13. It was an open confrontation regarding my concerns. The conversations I had with him beginning the first day we met set off red flags. I told him that first day that I was writing a book about ritual abuse and a bit about my history. I told him that day that my strategy was to be loud about my history. I made it clear that regardless of whether those I tell are dirty themselves or not, they know that there are many who are aware of my history. If anything were to happen to me it would be very clear why. He claimed to be a survivor himself and told me about his sad childhood growing up on Gang Street, Los Angeles. He was raised to be a sort of hit man for the local gang of drug dealers. If some kid came up short after a drug sale, he took care of them. Kicking people to the curb was his specialty. If he were asked to keep someone from attending a meeting at all costs he knew enough to start small. A slashed tire should do the trick. If the man is late to the meeting, his job is done.
Colonel Mustard assured me that he had the greatest respect for what I was doing. He was on my side. Then again that first day he said, “You keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.” Perhaps he felt I was too blonde to grasp the implication. I simply agreed with him. In fact, I could not agree more. Colonel Mustard told me that first day that he would be a valuable asset to me because he could tell me all about how the criminal mind works. He was a diagnosed sociopath himself. Not to worry. He has been through therapy. As a psychology major myself it is my understanding that there is no cure for a sociopath, and I told him so. He said that in therapy he learned to control his instincts by considering the consequences of his actions. Do you think a sociopath is capable of grasping the concept of, “don’t get caught”? As an example of how he might be of assistance he described how the mind of a sociopath works; how his mind works. If it were him, he would hang out around rape crisis centers and make victims of the victims. He would get information from the crisis counselors, or even become one himself. Yes, this is how sociopaths work.
Colonel Mustard told me that he had a really good attorney who helped him get off on charges related to his violent gang related drug dealing past. The attorney argued in court that Colonel Mustard had a very sad childhood and had the jury in tears. Why does Colonel Mustard have such powerful friends? Is it because, as he says, he made a deal with the authorities? In exchange for avoiding incarceration and having his record cleared he ratted on his fellow gangsters. This was a dangerous move on his part. He can never return to Los Angeles, he says, because those he ratted on would take their revenge. He knows how to survive on the run he assured me. He has military training. He could survive in the mountains, like Rambo. Of course he took back the part about being in the military himself once confronted regarding it. Once he told the heart wrenching tell about how he joined the army for his dad, and because of his brother. His dad had respected his brother so much for his service in the military. Once confronted, it was just his brother who was in the military.
Colonel Mustard told me he and his brother, who had been in Vietnam, had been told by their military commanders upon leaving the military that they may be called upon to assassinate citizens. Colonel Mustard says he was raised to be the extension of his brother’s fist, and he hates it. Then again, he also told me that a lot of sociopaths join the military because, well, they’re sociopaths. Where else can you kill and come home a hero for what you have done? He told me about how the Puerto Rican in him makes knives the weapon of choice. Puerto Ricans like to watch their victims bleed out. The women are manipulative. He laughed about the day his mother said, “Watch this,” and manipulated a fight between his uncle and his father. Colonel Mustard felt that he must be a hermaphrodite. He really enjoyed manipulating as well as using the Puerto Rican blades.
Colonel Mustard lies more than he tells the truth, but I suspect he keeps his lies close to the truth. Perhaps we can catch him in a lie or two. I suspect the time is coming soon when Colonel Mustard would be wise to utilize his Rambo skills, and run, or stick to his MO and be a rat. Here is the transcript of the first recorded conversations with Colonel Mustard.
Me: I am recording and I want to record from now on.
Colonel Mustard: Okay
Me: I have this letter I have written
Colonel Mustard: Is it long?
Colonel Mustard: If there is a big problem just let me know, and I want to fix whatever the issue is.
Me: The issues I confront.
Colonel Mustard: Then definitely I want to get to whatever the problem is.
Me: Okay, it says: The last few weeks I was with my family there were many threats made. The threats were cloaked. I was told that my sister-in-laws brother was in prison, not just for arson, but because the fire had been an intentional effort to kill the man inside. Her brother was addicted to pain killers. It was pointed out that people will do almost anything to satisfy an addiction. My nephew said, “I don’t want mommy to make Sasha dead.” That’s my dog. When I asked how Sasha might die he said his mother told him she might die in a fire…. It was very clear that they knew that I knew and, I knew that they knew etcetera. We were really just not talking about the elephant in the living room.
Since September 21st it has felt a lot like the last week I was with my family when you are here. So, I would hate for you to think that I don’t understand the metaphors. It didn’t accomplish much for me to not talk about the elephant then. So, I thought we would try to talk about the elephant.
Okay, so, you brought up the other officer who you would be visiting who made you feel the need to bring your digital recorder with you. I feel a recorder is my best interest when we are together. So I will be sure and have the recorder here.
Last week you spoke about the survey of the people on your Facebook account. You said you hang out with a lesbian couple. You wouldn’t mind having sex with this person’s wife. I wondered if you were speaking about [None of your business’s] wife.
Colonel Mustard: No, I have several gay and lesbian friends, but that was an inappropriate question… (Inaudible)
Me: Um, okay, and then, you have not fixed my computer, and when you brought it up last week you told me about an older woman who wanted to pay you for fixing her computer. You only asked for $40.00 but she insisted on $80.00. You said she doesn’t know how to surf the web. The virus was so down into the kernel or core of the computer it was impossible to get it out. It just froze regardless of what you did. This is precisely my experience. You insisted you were going to put a new drive in my computer for free, and I insisted over and over it was not necessary. Um, so, (Frankly the circumstances of my computer crashing are highly suspicious. I can save that for another day.)
Colonel Mustard: If you don’t want me to take care of it that’s fine.
Colonel Mustard: It’s like you just said, I wanted to put a new drive in for you. I don’t want anything in return. It’s nothing like that.
Me: Okay, you say you have a friend who works at the Maverick who looks out for me, for you. Should I feel safer with that?
Colonel Mustard: They actually brought it up because they saw you in this uniform [inaudible] and so whenever they see someone in a [none of your business] uniform they say, “Oh I saw one of your friends, and I say, “Awesome!” It’s nothing like. So I’ve been told that [none of your business] dropped in, and [inaudible] dropped in. So, they just tell me about all of the people they have seen. [Inaudible] and so it’s not anything to be concerned about.
Me: Okay. Um, you suggested I might be too tired to drive safely the last time you were here. I said nothing about being tired. Of course you could say that you were genuinely concerned about my safety. You offered caffeine to make sure that I stayed awake for my drive home. This safety issue regarding my drive home was, driven home. We both know that I am used to staying up until midnight. Swing shift it my usual shift. So, I guess I felt like, why were you afraid that I might fall asleep at the wheel the other night?
Colonel Mustard: Well, you looked tire, and I was concerned that you looked tired. Okay, you genuinely looked tired.
Me: Alright. Okay, um, you said that in the past you had been ordered to do things like detain someone from making an appointment. You would do things like slash their tires if that’s what it took. You said your brother gave the orders. You still communicate with your brother. You don’t like being the extension of your brother’s fist, but are you? Would you slash my tires in order to keep me from making my appointment with the publisher?
Colonel Mustard: No way. I wouldn’t. I would never do anything to cause you pain. [Inaudible].
Me: Okay, later on I talk about backstabbing and the Facebook question too. You said you and your brother were told on discharge that if the president ordered martial law you would be called in to enforce it. You said you were told you might be called on to assassinate citizens. You have back stepped and said it was just your brother who was in the military and received these orders, but your brother has given orders to you in the past regarding hits of a sort. Do you understand why I’m concerned?
Colonel Mustard: No, I understand. And most, all of the stuff my brother ordered me to do was before the military. Since he joined the military and gotten out of the military there was about eight months that I had [Inaudible], and after that I have had no contact with my brother at all.
Me: But you communicate with him now.
Colonel Mustard: I communicate with him on a bi-monthly basis.
Me: And, you said you go into a tantrum and you raged whenever you talk to him. So do you think it’s safe to do that?
Colonel Mustard: My activity is still about my brother, and I still care about his safety, and I still care about my nephew, and I want them to be safe.
Me: Alright, um, you warned me to be careful around electronics. They, okay, basically this is the question about when you said that my phone was cloned. How do you know this?
Colonel Mustard: Just from what you were describing.
Me: And you know about phones.
Colonel Mustard: About cloning phones, yeah. I don’t do it, but I, it’s just part of the stuff that I…[Inaudible]. Especially with the fact that a (did he really say, “I lied and”?)… sometimes I think that sometimes my phone has been cloned because I’ll get weird messages from people about conversations that I’ve had on the phone and how that this other person had no idea what this other person I was talking to said when I had the conversation. So, with the self-protection thing that you’re describing and the problems you’re having and the things you have dealt with are a lot like mine. (Colonel Mustard told me that I can be tracked using my cell phone even if it’s turned off. That’s why Verizon is making phones in which the battery cannot be removed. He told me my phone had been cloned. He knows a lot for someone raised in the streets.)
Me: Okay, and it is. Okay, you said you use spiders for assassinations to eliminate suspicion. Um, we have problems with spiders here. Okay, you said, “Dogs do that too when their scared,” when I was yawning. Are you trying to frighten me?
Colonel Mustard: Um, no. In fact my entire goal is to be a support. Okay, um, I genuinely, when we first talked, okay, everything I [Inaudible]… so the key is, it’s a personal issue. Turning people around when they’re not safe [Inaudible], that’s it, I’m motivated by, by ah, I guess you could say I will be doing whatever it takes to keep you safe.
Me: When did that happen? [Laughter]
Colonel Mustard: It happened because I had the chance to keep someone in your position safe. The person I was [Inaudible]. The person I am now, is someone who is trying to protect you and keep you safe, okay? [Inaudible]… If I wanted [Inaudible]. I was asked by [Inaudible]. She said, “I just want to make sure that you have [my] best interest at heart. [Inaudible] I don’t want you to feel like [Inaudible]. Alright, and that recording the conversation while I’m talking to you, or me not coming into your post, or doing whatever it takes I’m good with it, Okay?
Me: Okay, I’ll continue. Okay you said Porto Rican women are manipulative and will intentionally provoke a fight. Then you called yourself a hermaphrodite insinuating that as a Porto Rican you would do both, enjoy fighting with a knife so you could watch people bleed out, and manipulate fights. I have been very open with you regarding my history. I was also honest with you regarding the reason for this. I like the idea that everyone knows where I am, my history and that if I go missing or I am harmed or anyone I care about is harmed there will be many questions.
You said that you and your brother would be expected to do the hits and be the patsies. Your brother is waiting for a call and would be willing to blow up Idaho. I suppose the understanding that you will be the patsy if you are caught comes with the territory of being a hit man. And you expressed that you were concerned about financing the, your, the school for your boys so.
Colonel Mustard: [Inaudible] The only thing I have ever done. [Inaudible] Okay, that’s all I did. That was my job, okay. When I worked for my brother. I don’t think I can take another life is what I’m trying to say. My brother would tell us to do something stupid like, well something I don’t know, oh yeah, I’m sure I [Inaudible]. The fact of the matter is, I’m not my brother’s donkey anymore, okay? I’m my own person.
Me: Well I guess you fixed my printer [Laughter].
Colonel Mustard: Okay, the full honest truth is… [His phone rings]. (Why are you yelling at me right now? Oh, because it’s time to get on to that other shift.) Umm, I am doing everything I can to not be the person that I used to be. And the reason I told you who I used to be is so that you understand that [Inaudible, my actions, Inaudible], and the people who [Inaudible], Okay?
Me: Okay. Okay here’s one. You told a joke about knights: A knight in shining armor has never tested his medal. It’s best if they have a few dents. You added that some are really just wearing aluminum foil. They could just crumple it up and throw it away when they were done pretending to be knights. Again, we are back to the same thing. Were you just pretending to be my hero? [No response from Colonel Mustard] Um, and you said that hearing someone beg for their life made you feel like God?
Colonel Mustard: The reason I said that was because it’s true.
Me: Now you know that God is love, so you know it’s not true.
Colonel Mustard: Well, I mean it makes you feel like you have a sense of power. When I did it [Inaudible]. Who I was [Inaudible] when that happened. Who I am, it doesn’t take much. Could I ever kill a person if I had to, yeah. [Inaudible]. Well, I’m glad you decided to talk to me and voice your questions and concerns [Inaudible].
Me: Do you understand, my history, given my history, why this would be concerning?
Colonel Mustard: Oh, yeah.
Me: And you said at one point you know how to think like [Inaudible]?
Colonel Mustard: Yes I do. You have to. The problem is, and I’m sure you’ve heard the quote that if you stare at fear long enough, it stares back. The truth is [Inaudible] you come to understand at the very least how to avoid being the target, Okay?
Me: Tell me, how to avoid being a target, because you know very well I’m not safe here.
Colonel Mustard: Why would I avoid being a target?
Me: How would I avoid being a target? Because you know very well I’m not safe here.
Colonel Mustard: No, you can’t avoid being a target. One time, you know, what I want you to understand is that despite all the bad things about me, I’m all right. I choose to not [Inaudible], Okay? And if you’re in trouble I’ll [Inaudible], Okay? It’s a horrible thing. The things I did were horrible. The key is now, when necessary, I can [Inaudible]. I…
Me: Do you feel a difference?
Colonel Mustard: Yeah, there’s a huge difference. There’s a huge difference. I made a vow that I wouldn’t do it for money.
Me: When did you make that vow?
Colonel Mustard: I made that vow about the time I checked out [Inaudible].
Me: And what’s wrong with it?
Colonel Mustard: I told myself that I’m better than that. Do you understand [Inaudible].
Me: It was a regret?
Colonel Mustard: It was, I guess you could say, a form of regret. A form of repentance. I asked for forgiveness from God, [Inaudible]. I had to make a choice. I, I, I didn’t get to choose which side I was on. I get to choose now, and I choose every day when I get up. There’s no reason to go back to the person I was. There’s nothing anybody can offer me to make it, would make it worth [Inaudible]. I’m the keeper of what soul I have left. It’s not for sale.
Me: That’s the question. Are you selling your soul or not?
Colonel Mustard: [Inaudible]. When I say that I, I really, I mean, that I care about you very, very much.
Me: Do you understand that I’m sitting here in a lot of danger? Whether you’re a bad guy or not, I’m sitting in a lot of danger.
Colonel Mustard: I understand that but as long as I’m here, [Inaudible], because if someone was to try something here, and I was to see him first.
Me: Just checking sides, ya know?
Colonel Mustard: There’s no question. I’ll be honest with you. It hurts me that I have to answer that question, Okay. When I say that I love you, I mean it. I know that you’re not big into the whole, I know that you are not into my religion but I pray every night for your safety.
Me: Okay, well I really, my religion is eclectic. So, I don’t really care what your religion is. If you are praying, and you are honestly praying than it’s the same God I have.
Colonel Mustard: I hope you understand that I want nothing but the best for you. I want you to feel safe. I want you to be safe. If there was a way that I could make all the people who are threatening you go away I would. But to do that I would have to become something that I try not to be. But I’ll be that if you need me to, to keep you safe, but I hope you won’t make me do it, for my own reasons.
Me: I mean for the right reasons, you know.
Colonel Mustard: Okay, I care about your welfare very much, and if I was to ever see or hear anybody [Inaudible], there will be serious, ramifications for that person.
Me: Just so you know I need to feel safe around you.
Colonel Mustard: Well, tell me, I will do everything I have to.
Me: Until you make me feel safe.
Colonel Mustard: Yes, I will. Whatever you want, whatever you need, okay? I don’t care if you call me up one night and say I’m nervous [Inaudible]. I will sit on your street until [Inaudible]. I don’t care how late I have to sit outside your doorstep. I need to do whatever I have to, Okay. I’m here for my friends. I know that honestly as a supervisor, it’s against the rules for me to care so much, but there’s morally and ethically [Inaudible]. And morally and ethically I can’t let somebody [Inaudible]. I’ve seen it worse. [Inaudible]. We both have issues. We both know [Inaudible]. Those aluminum foil knights? Yeah, there’s a lot of them. There are fair weather friends. There are those who show up and help you out, and there are those who take off. But, I got nowhere to go. [Inaudible] I would have to [Inaudible]. Just tell me what I have to do, alright.
Me: Alright, alright, okay, well just, you know, I’ll, when I start questioning your comments I’ll just tell you right up front they’re there, because it’s kind of weird for me right now.
Colonel Mustard: Exactly, and know what, if you need to [Inaudible]
Me: I will
Colonel Mustard: Okay, you just do, whatever you gotta do, alright.
Colonel Mustard: Alright? Good?
Me: Yeah, I got my printer fixed.
Colonel Mustard: Alright, I’ll just try to print one more thing and make sure it sticks and I’ll get out of here.
I had intended to get through the letter I had written. Here are a few parts I left out:
You said the following question was on your facebook survey, “would you betray this person or do you believe they would betray you?” You responded with, “No, not for $100.00! but um, well, you start upping the ante then maybe.” You quoted from your facebook account, “Is this person still alive because you can’t afford a hit man?”
You say you have the best attorney ever, a man who can take a lie and turn it around 180 degrees and make it sound like the truth. You say he had people feeling sorry for you and offering you help when at first they were of the opinion that you were evil. Your attorney told them about your sad history. You say you and your brother can fake any mental illness. You do not have DID. You are a psychopath. Only a psychopath would consciously fake a mental disorder in hopes of avoiding the consequences of their crimes. Someone who is DID does not maintain consciousness of what they do. If you consciously choose to accept the assignment of assassin it’s premeditated murder.
You feel the police officer who sat behind you making notes was wasting his time. The only thing they might find on you is that you are delinquent on a 3 cent toll in another state. You told me you are guilty of crimes and your record was washed clean because you are a snitch. You would be doing yourself a favor if you stuck to that MO.
You pretended not to notice that the picture on YouTube you had pulled up was pornographic. Were you hoping to set me up? You are a supervisor. Surely you know the rules regarding computers. (He had YouTube pulled up when I returned from a break. There was a picture on the side like the male female figures on bathroom doors, but it was a male taking a female from behind. He made some comment about it being the bathroom for dogs. I didn’t think it was funny and told him he shouldn’t be on the computer. I find it ironic that I missed this, now that being on the company computer is my only crime, and I am out of a job.)
The next morning, (10/20/13) I tried again with at least one of the comments he made that concerned me and I had not mentioned. You’ll notice that the conversation the day before was moved toward making friends. You’ll also notice that the conversation was being recorded, and he knew it. The conversation the next morning went like this:
Me: So you know what we were talking about. There’s um, I was realizing that the one that I forgot on my list that I was most concerned about was the Facebook thing where you had somebody pop up on your Facebook, and it said, “Why is this person still alive? You can’t afford a hit man?”
Colonel Mustard: Oh, yeah that was a,
Me: What was that?
Colonel Mustard: It was a picture that somebody posted on Facebook saying,
Me: Who was it a picture of?
Colonel Mustard: Oh, well it was not, it was just a picture of a grave, and it’s just like.
Me: A grave?
Colonel Mustard: Yeah, and it said, “Like if you know someone who is alive because you can’t afford a hit man. That was the whole picture [laughter], and I’m like
Colonel Mustard: I just thought it was funny, you know, cause, you know, there are people in my life who I kinda wish would go away forever.
Me: Yeah, okay. Alright so …. (I gave the pass down for the day)
Colonel Mustard says he was excused of his previous crimes because he was a snitch. I suggest he stick to that MO and snitch again. Little boys playing at warriors and using aluminum foil armor will find themselves in a world of hurt if real bullets start to fly.
Colonel Mustard made it clear that he doesn’t like to be stabbed in the back. This character trait would come up in another officer. People have been known to kill because they felt someone stabbed them in the back. Let’s be very clear and up front then. If I am harmed, it will have nothing at all to do with any hatred of backstabbing. It will have everything to do with my history with a dangerous criminal underground. We can compare notes on backstabbing. There is more to come.