I would like to point out, that the dates that trouble survivors are not just the Christian holidays, or even the civil holidays like Mother’s Day (It’s like She said, “Everyone has a mother.”). I have survivor friends very distraught over Beltane, that’s May 1st, a pagan holiday. These same survivors were troubled over Easter…. The curse that is responsible for troubling survivors is interfaith. To resolve the issues brought to us by these cursed ones, we will need to be too.
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The Search Key Phrases from my Visitors Stats Page for this period provides me with the opportunity to present the following: “Snoops a bump in the road you won’t forget” and “Obama mocks the resurrection.”
Perhaps someone is pissed that I found the work of Snoops useful in pointing out that President Obama did not champion the coming New World Order. It was an urban legend created by a bit of computer doctoring. It’s worth considering the motive behind such a lie, don’t you think? Perhaps someone is pissed that my Facebook follower’s claim that “Obama mocks the resurrection” has been met with a similar opinion to one that Snoops might take regarding such a claim, against our Christian president. It’s worth considering the motive behind such a lie, don’t you think? I am editing this 4/23/14 post on 5/1/15 to add a trigger warning for survivors. I add it with a link to a previous post (A Compassionate Solution for the Dark Ones).
I said that She gave me enough time to wrap some knuckles. Yes, I meant rap some knuckles, and I lied. She gave me enough time to rap her knuckles, but I’ve decided to up the ante yet again. Let’s see just how many knuckles we can line up. My experience working with She for short has been priceless. I had considered being a forensic psychologist, among the many brands of psychology I couldn’t bring myself to choose from. Text book learning is nothing compared to real world experience. How many can say they have had an opportunity to work with the criminally insane, in a professional capacity. I am gaining this experience, and it’s priceless. She asked me one day if I thought she was mean. I did not reply. It pissed her off enough that she acknowledged that what she was doing was harassment, but it could not be proven. I tried to keep my smile on the inside. I didn’t really hurt her feelings. Sociopaths don’t really care if you like them, the way normal people do, but if frustrates them if you don’t like them, because it’s so much easier to manipulate someone who doesn’t have their number. She has all the arrogance that goes with being a Narcissistic Sociopath, regardless of her lack of intellectual prowess, or education. I have had to learn that power in the hands of the ignorant can be a dangerous thing. Dark Ones should really be contained until they can find some connection to their human born side, if they have one. I believe She has one. After all, she wore her eye liner today. She hasn’t worn eyeliner in quite a while. Those who speak of the Illuminati as if they know the inner workings, do know the inner workings, of the Nazi cult that created their nightmare. From the earliest beginnings of the Illuminati conspiracy movement, back in the day when Nesta Webster was accusing the Jews of being Illuminati leaders, and ignoring that the original Illuminati would not allow Jewish membership, Illuminati conspiracy theorists have been describing the Illuminati like it was a spy network. The founder of the Illuminati, Adam Weishupt, at the time they infiltrated the Freemasons, did organize his little secret society like a spy ring. The original members were ordered to observe and report every detail of the lives of those around them. So, are these Nazis the CIA? I say, Nope, regardless of their invitation into our country through visas handed out by our Intelligence agencies. My niece and nephews were being trained to be spies, saboteurs, and thieves. She for short behaves just as they did. There is the innocent sounding question cloaked in the perfect context, the expectation that the reply with the information requested will be next. Then there is the moment of gloating when it worked, just because we are all so well socialized to tell people the information they ask for. She for short was sure to gloat about breaking the HIPPA laws when I told her the details of the medications I am on, and how I might plan to get them, even if I don’t have health insurance, and on and on I blabbed. We know how that turned out, don’t we? Did I tell you the story She told of being kicked out of Costco because she was caught behind the staff only doors, innocently lost of course, and not a Costco member. She was using her mother’s membership card, but mother wasn’t there. Excuse me, I digress. My point was, victims of the Nazi cult tend to be trained to extract information. They are well trained spies and such, even if they do lack the intelligence to make a good CIA agent. She for short is in a position of power. “Does your mother live in the state?” is innocent enough, cloaked in the information gathering of a schedule maker. When my “what’s up?” rather than, “Yes,” or “No,” was my socially awkward, yet appropriate response, she just wanted to know if I had plans with my mother for Mother’s Day. She was doing the schedule and all. If I had scheduling needs I would have had more than ample opportunity to share them with her. It has been my experience that having scheduling needs becomes an opportunity for her to screw me, so it is likely better if I keep any scheduling needs to myself regardless. If She for short worked for the CIA, I suspect she would not need to milk me for my mother’s whereabouts, the details of my medication needs, or whether my sister has children. She would already have this information. Perhaps she is just teasing me, and already has this information, but if those involved in this pathetic secret society cult have the resources of the CIA, then they already know what I have planned next. I suspect they, these CIA wanna bes, don’t have a clue who I really am. Yes, I will need more time than she gave me, but then, I’m smart enough to take the time I need. We will get to the end of this story, regardless of the length of the chap book, or Tome. In the end, the Dark Ones will get the time they so desperately need, in order to meet the wounded children they are. There will be time and a place for them to move from criminally insane, to an exquisitely valuable part of the whole. My hope for every one of them is the wisdom and courage to use that time and space well. My psychic friend used to say, “If you are asking for wisdom, duck and cover.” This post needs to begin with a trigger warning. This post carries with it a knowledge regarding the system of survivors which survivors themselves find the strength to deal with last if they find the strength to face it at all. If you are a survivor, I would consider carefully whether you are ready to know what is written here. Have an advocate at your side.
Once the public is aware of those among us who live in trauma based multiplicity, the question of a solution will become the topic of discussions. What we all need to understand is that survivors of the Nazi cult that infected my family are programmed to do and be against humanity. The immediate response is to save survivors from the hell they have been living. The complication becomes, how do we save them from themselves? The woman during the first training I received was asked, “Who would do that?!” Who would commit these atrocities against children?! Her response was, “We did. It was conditioned.” These survivors were raised in the cult. They participated in horrific rituals as children, because they had no choice. They participated in horrific rituals as adults, because it was all that they knew, and as far as they knew, their survival depended on participation. The cult, also happened to be their family. Well, that was what one of the women said anyway. The other was obviously extremely traumatized by this revelation and had to leave the room. The discussion turned to how painful it is to know this. Those parts, or alters, subjected to the most horrific experiences are deeper in the system and the memories of these alters come later. Memories of participation come much later. What we need to understand in our efforts to help those who have been raised in hell, is that in order to free them, they need to face the demons they themselves carry with them. Survivors are not just victims of extreme trauma. They are perpetrators of extreme trauma. They will need to know this about themselves, and then forgive themselves. Could you? How to create a killer: They start with an innocent child and torture the child until the child complies. Svali tells us about children being electrocuted until they obey and wring the neck of a puppy. Some survivors speak of having robot alters. By the time a child is ready to do as they are told and commit the atrocities they are instructed to commit there is sometimes not much left of the resulting personality in the way of emotion. They are like robots. They may have refused and been tortured into unconsciousness, and now believe that parts of themselves capable of compassion and defiant against evil are dead. If they are still alive, those parts of themselves are still there as well. The beautiful compassionate warriors who fought to defy evil even in the small defenseless bodies of children, are still there. These little warriors will be grief stricken beyond comprehension to realize that the puppy was indeed strangled to death, and it was their little hands that did the strangling. The pain is huge beyond measure. The guilt and shame, the horror, is greater than the torture they endured. As a singleton, as some survivors call those who are not multiple, we may say we would never commit a human atrocity. Survivors would say the same thing. As a whole, they are not the type of person who would commit the atrocities they committed. In my book I mentioned the book/movie Sophia’s Choice. It was a common Nazi practice to pose non-choices in the guise of choices to their victims. A choice to kill this child, or that one, is not a choice. Survivors had no choice. They will need a great compassion for themselves in order to forgive themselves. They will need a support system of others capable of compassion as well. Can we forgive them? Those parts who some survivors call their “Dark Ones” did for them what needed to be done to survive. The dark ones provide a strength necessary in dire situations that no one should have to be exposed to. The capabilities of dark ones, can be utilized in positive ways. They are capable of doing the difficult. They can be given difficult tasks that will bring them, their soul mates, and the rest of us, into a better, kinder, safer world. Dark ones have been lied to. Once they understand this, they will change their loyalties. Dark ones may not know that they can be hurt, that they were hurt. They may be shocked to meet those parts of themselves who are deeply wounded, by those they have been loyal to. The survivor who presented at my first training told of a time she woke to find herself half way home, or her parent’s house rather. One of her alters missed her mother. So she had called her mother, who accessed a cult loyal alter and persuaded her to return home. The survivor had to frantically renegotiate her safety. She had to go into hiding all over again. Survivors may not be able to just leave, before they have brought all of their parts together in the commitment to stay gone. I have spoken with survivors who have not yet managed to get all of their parts on board for the move toward safety. I have heard survivors wish that someone would tie them down, lock them in a room. They want so badly to flee to safety but somehow there is some part of them that keeps getting up and taking them into the danger zone, yet again. They would sign a waiver to have themselves confined, at least some part of them. I envision a safety zone for survivors where the full dynamic of their history is understood. Yes, survivors need to be held accountable for what they have done. They can do this within the context of a healing place where change is the objective, where integration is the objective. They need a sort of witness protection arrangement where they are safe from those who created their nightmare, and safely at a distance from the possibility that they might respond to their destructive training before they have confronted this aspect of their conditioning. In Ritual Abuse and Mind Control: The Manipulation of Attachment Needs, Lisa, a survivor, is told by a detective inspector that there is no bargaining in this country, and no law on duress. She could face a twelve year sentence (Epstein, Schwartz, Wingfield-Schwartz, 2011). We need to look at this carefully given that the greatest tool we have for uprooting this nightmare is the information provided by survivors. If we punish them for facing demons we would have to consider careful whether we ourselves would have the courage to face, how will we ever uproot this evil? That is not to say that those who pose a threat should not be contained. Survivors are our greatest resource in the war to end the evil they have touched so intimately. The nightmare they know well, is our nightmare too. We can join them in their craving to bring an end to evil, but we need to understand it, and show compassion. The world needs laws and resources to provide a compassionate solution. Epstein, O. B., Schwartz J. & Wingfield-Schwartz, R. (Eds.) (2011). Ritual Abuse and Mind Control: The Manipulation of Attachment Needs, London: Karnac Books Ltd., The Bowlby Centre. One day She for short asked me if I was left handed. I am not, and was not using my left hand in any way that would warrant such a question. I pointed out that I was using my right hand as the dominant hand and asked why she thought to ask the question. She just wondered, then said, “Perhaps the right hand doesn’t know what the left hand is doing.” This might be a good time to point out that in the dark side cults that worship dark side characters like Set and Satan call their practice following the left hand path. I think it is time to wrap the knuckles on the left hand. What makes them think the right hand doesn’t know what they are up to? Watch me now. I believe She has given me just enough time to do that.
I apologize for not getting this on my blog yesterday. Things got busy just after the train wreck, in which I was literally involved. No worries. It was nothing more than a quick stop. I’m fine.
I had been planning on getting to my blog sooner however, to share the following bit of trivia. One of the first customers to greet me in the morning said nothing, but he wore a black T-shirt that said, “I’m Gonna Shank a Bitch.” I guess he doesn’t know that it should be “going to,” it should be, “I’m Going to Shank a Bitch.” I really shouldn’t talk. I’ve been informed, more than once, that quotation marks should not be used as emphasis. Anyway, I thought I might share that they are adding another possible weapon to the mix. I suspect that these scared children are hoping they can scare me to death. I wouldn’t count on it if I were you. Stick with the playing pieces that came with the board game. I mean, what does a “scare” look like, the famous painting “The Scream”? I have a Facebook following. I checked the personal page of one of my new followers and found a post with the title, “Obama Mocks the Resurrection of Jesus, Watch David Cameron Set Him Straight.” My follower lead into this share with the comment, “clone on right (Pres. Obama) is ripe for the picking...”
I have serious doubts as to whether this follower has read my book. On page 23 of Save Me, I’m Yours, I tell about my sister-in-law threatening me with “is the fruit ripe yet? I think it is.” On page 284 I tell about an encounter with another survivor who asked if I had been threatened. When I said I had but not literally, she said, “Oh no, they won’t. They’ll just carry on a conversation in front of you and ask, ‘Is the fruit ripe yet?’” It’s stunning how frequently I get confirmation that I nailed it. This cult is consistently found to provoke religious, especially Christian, fanaticism. Obama is a Christian. Doubting the details of the resurrection is the right of every American, as long as we have religious freedom. Let’s not lose it to these, not as underground as they may think, Nazis. Hitler’s Positive Christianity, was spawned straight from the Black Order of the S.S.. Don’t you forget it. When She for Short left the position she had with a previous company she stomped out angry because she did not get her way. She had already been written up for insubordination, or so she says. Perhaps She has a tendency to project.
She for short tells the story of the time she asked her coworker to put the kitchen knife down that her coworker was waving at her, or she would kick her coworker in the chest. She kicked her coworker in the chest. We have a curtesy rule in the kitchen. When carrying a knife we are to warn those around us, “behind you with a knife.” I am noticing that the other employees enjoy using this warning when they bring the knives to the sink from behind me as I stand at the sink. I seem to be the only one provided this curtesy. A few days ago a friend of She’s in uniform, came to return the old rusty open blade box cutter he had borrowed. She told him he could keep it. He joked about how he would be sure to file off the serial number before he killed someone with it so that it could not be traced back to her, and thanked her for the blade. One day a woman asked to borrow our scissors to open a package. While she was away using the scissors one of my coworkers told about the time a customer asked to borrow scissors to open the package to a knife he had purchased. He then used the knife to stab another customer. My coworker demonstrated the stabbing and informed me that it could be dangerous to loan out scissors. On Easter She for short discussed the fact that knives keep disappearing from our kitchen. Perhaps she should get a lock box for them. We only have three of our Dexter knives left. She showed me her hands Easter morning. She had a sliver and a cut in the palm of her hand that was split from being dry and cold. She just couldn’t get warm on Easter. Easter morning She for Short started the day with a revelation regarding her previous employment at a doctor’s office. It was not the first time she told me about how she had refused to falsify a patient document, and was fired for her insubordination. Easter morning she added that the doctor’s wife for whom she worked did not like her much and had accused her “of shit” she says she was not guilty of. She tells us that the doctor’s wife was just jealous because the doctor liked her, and had been very generous. The doctor’s wife’s attitude toward her when she quit was, “good riddance.” She for short seems to be having trouble with a schedule request I have had in place for the past five months, which she has been kind enough to respect, until recently. My schedule request seems to have become an issue for her since the time she informed me that she has been instructed to punish employees who do not do as she says, by docking hours and mangling their schedule. I asked her what sort of behavior might warrant such a punishment. She does not have an answer. She for short asked me on Easter, after confirming her understanding, “So it’s just you and your sister now? Does your sister have children?” I suppose it was an innocent enough line of conversation. It felt like a threat regardless. Perhaps it’s just me, or perhaps it is just She. I wished I had not allowed her to provide a ride for me to my sister’s house on an earlier date. “No, my sister does not have children to entertain for Easter,” I responded. They went out of town. She for short told us again on Easter the story about how she got into a horrible fight with a worker at Costco when she went there to pick up some medication. The woman was “like a Nazi,” because She was using her mother’s membership card, but her mother was not there. She had been caught in the employee area. How should she know she was doing anything wrong? She was just lost. One day She noted to me her awareness that I did not have insurance, and asked what I planned to do about obtaining my medication. I informed her that I was not terribly concerned. Costco has a really cool pharmacy policy. Many times the medications are quite affordable even without insurance. I told her about Costco’s lifesaving pharmacy prices, and that the pharmacy in our store would match Costco’s prices. I told her how I had used this method in the past when I did not have insurance. I also informed her that I do have insurance. She asked what company I had a policy with. I told her, unfortunately, Humana. Perhaps I underestimated the resources available to those in the ranks of my enemy. There was a time my Verizon bill spiked to $500, for no valid reason. I was told my jetpack had kept updating and using data. I needed to turn my jetpack off when I was not using it. It had been an easy enough fix, but Colonel Mustard had warned me earlier that month that “they” could create spikes in bills that would be justified as mistakes, and paid for by trusting customers. Customers are trapped in contracts, and lack resources to fight large corporations for a price not quite worth the fight. When I went to pick up my medication on Friday, I discovered that my insurance could not be used at their pharmacy. My medications would be $1,000, nearly my monthly income. I would have to go to Walmart where Humana has a contract. I asked them to match Costco. They informed me that my medication was not on their list for this practice. I was stunned. My medication had not changed. They had done this before for me. I transferred my prescription to Walmart. Monday, I went to pick up my prescription at Walmart. Walmart informed me that my medication is not on the list of medications covered by my insurance. The medication would be $800.00. I called my insurance company and explained that they would do well to cover my medication rather than pay the hospital bill when I had a break because I am not on my medication. Then they would still need to decide if they wanted to provide the medication necessary to restore my health. It reminds me of the threat Hitler made toward those who might not vote for him. Those who refused to be Nazi would “be the bloody enemy, no more to be helped.” Today it would seem there are Nazis in influential positions within our medical insurance corporations. Socialism is sounding better and better all the time, as long as We the People are deciding the distribution of wealth, and We the People are not brainwashed into believing we owe allegiance to “the divine right of kings,” or overly concerned with the threat that providing enough food for the children of single mothers working 40 hours a week might cut into the profits of the wealthy. I won’t tell you who to quote as being concerned that this form of poverty should not be cured “on the backs of the wealthy.” Yes, She is currently interested in mangling my schedule. I know I have mentioned that maintaining sleep patterns is vital to maintaining my health and preventing a manic episode, and that creating a break might be a goal of a group interested in discrediting me. I suspected that Miss Scarlet may have held this candlestick at one time, if you recall. I would like to note that as this post is written, I still have access to medication. So, will it be She with a candlestick or He with a knife, or serial number free blade, or perhaps the revolver? Let’s not forget the revolver or rope. It’s fascinating how this is unfolding. I truly would not have suspected She of being connected to the cult I have exposed, even though She has been a nightmare from the beginning. She had participated in hiring me in the first place. I have simply assumed that the abuse I have endured at her hands was an unrelated personality flaw in someone unworthy of her position. The story of her father’s fixation with the swastika peaked my interest. Her “working relationship” with Don-Dexter, and love of raw meat added to my inclination to make her post worthy. Then there was her active threats, and her interest in my medication and her Costco story. Now she blames her splintered and split hand on the pruning of trees on Easter eve. For now we can chalk up these quirks of hers, to the threat I pose of exposing her unethical practices at work, rather than any involvement in the dangerous cult guilty of creating split personalities in children. We can chalk up her changing make-up techniques to allergies to makeup, as she claims, I suppose. It’s fascinating how this is unfolding. It may be that this cult works by simply utilizing members, assets, and manipulated citizens, within the positions and professions they currently hold. I have already stated this after all. They utilize the professions of those they manipulate: nurses, doctors, politicians and morticians, security officers and…. It would seem we are surrounded. They sit next to us in our church pews, our places of employment, and in our government. Even I keep forgetting the possibilities of such an organization, with manipulated folks in pharmacies, and carrying food handler permits. She should really learn to wear her hair net properly. Don’t you think? Did you know that red mold in cheese can be very dangerous to the health of children, the elderly, and those with weakened immune systems? “And they went up on the breadth of the earth, and compassed the camp of the saints about, and the beloved city: and fire came down from God out of heaven, and devoured them.” – Revelations 20:9 My sister tried to warn me that it would be too much of a struggle to try to remain in the position I am, “Look where staying got Tammy!” she snapped. “Yes, just look. Tammy still has her job,” I responded. I had to admit, inwardly, that I know that Tammy is struggling within a hostile work environment, just as I am. What my sister is missing, is that there is no escape. There will be a hostile work environment wherever a survivor, or an advocate, may go. It was unkind of me to involve an advocate, or my sister for that matter, but I know that Tammy is a fighter like me. I wish my warrior friend all the medication she needs, the retirement she deserves, and an opportunity to spit in the eye of her harassers, whether she is inclined to use the opportunity or not. I don’t believe Tammy is inclined to spit in people’s eyes. Neither am I, but it sure feels good to say it sometimes, doesn’t Tammy? We hope our harassers will find tears of their own, without our help. In a wiser moment we (Tammy and I) wish all the therapy they need to annihilate their brainwashing, if I may speak for my friend, with whom I may not speak. I can provide a small bit of personal history provided by, and about, She for Short. She is bloodline, of German decent. Her father traced and painted a giant swastika on his wall. She is much easier to deal with when she doesn’t wear her eyeliner along the edge of her top lid, but still catty. She asked me to rescue her from any conversations she might be trapped in with Don, then changed her mind. Now she tells me Don is alright. They have established a “good working relationship.” The issue She has with me, is that I am very aware of the unethical activity she is engaged in at work. She says I “would have to be able to prove it.” She forgets, I spent six years in a career based in the art of proving it. She asked me if I knew what a hostile work environment is like. I didn’t know whether she was referring to the hostile work environment she was threatening to arrange for me, or complaining about the constant indication that I am aware of her unethical practices.
Some who care about me feel I should find another job, and leave this ugly alone. She for Short has the power to cause considerable havoc in my life, and is actively engaged in providing for me, a hostile work environment. Some who care about me, don’t like the sound of revenge in my voice when I tell them I plan to “take her down.” I suppose they are right. I should change my heart. I should recognize that it is simply a matter of stopping evil in its tracks even for the sake of the evil doer. After all, it is highly likely she has been trained for evil through exquisitely sadistic mind control methods. I should consider those possibilities and fill my heart with compassion for her, as I take her down. As for the concern for me in the voices of those who care for me, it’s who I am. I fight. I do not do victim, and I do not believe in leaving those in power who are inclined to victimize. Deal with it. TW: TW, is short for “trigger warning.” What I am about to write needs to begin with a trigger warning for survivors. What I am about to write here is a depiction of what goes on during Easter for ritual abuse survivors. I provide this so that those in the public seeking to understand, support survivors, and join an effort to put an end to these atrocities will have an opportunity to fully understand the issue. Survivors are individuals, each with a unique way of healing, and each at a different point in their healing. For some this message will be too soon. For others it may be painful, but helpful in recovering memories and validating their own experience. For others it may be old news and simply a history they prefer to leave in the past. Whatever your place as a reader, now you know what to expect and you may make an informed choice as to whether you wish to read on.
This Easter, and every Easter since my niece asked about eyeballs, all holidays have taken on a dark and painful feel. I know what my loved ones may be enduring. Easter, in the Christian tradition, is a celebration of the resurrection of Jesus. It is a celebration of new life, in both the Christian and the Pagan tradition. For the Pagans they appreciate the goddess of spring, Ostara. The cult that is guilty of the ritual abuse atrocities committed against my family pervert religious holidays. Survivors who describe being buried alive in coffins and shallow graves as children, sometimes with dead bodies, and or spiders are remembering the Easter celebrations of their cult involved families. One survivor who told me about the events of this holiday said that she had a relative who did not survive this burial ritual. She believed he died of fright. Easter is a mockery of the resurrection. Easter is a mockery of new life. Children are told to go ahead and pray to Jesus, and hope that he will save them as they a buried. When they are rescued from their night of terror by the very adults who placed them there, they will be mocked if they prayed. They are told that Jesus will never save them. They belong to Satan. The cult members will be the only ones who will save them. This creates a sort of perverted bonding with their cult family. The message is that survival is dependent on cult loyalty. There are survivors who have witnessed people being crucified. I think of my nephew staring into the backyard at Easter time and saying, “we slept outside last night.” It had been far too cold, for any sane humans, to make children sleep outside. I think of my niece, with her diabetes that needs to be monitored so closely at night. Holidays are a time I feel survivor guilt, and can barely restrain myself from running in with hopes of saving the day. Holidays, such as Easter, are a very painful time of year. Holidays I sit with my survivor friends, and listen to their pain and night terrors. Holidays I wish for relief from ignorance, and a future where children are all safe in warm beds and loved by all their village. Beautiful flowers, and a celebration of life to you all. Happy Easter, and I do mean happy, warm, and safe. |
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